What if you are the main thing that is holding your marriage back from its greatest potential?

What if you are the main thing that is holding your marriage back from its greatest potential? Sounds scary, right? That’s a lot of responsibility. It should be encouraging because that’s also a lot of power and control that you have right in your own hands.

I have said before that you could change your life by changing one thing: yourself.

By taking responsibility for your:

  • personal growth,
  • improvement,
  • strength,
  • maturity,
  • attitude,
  • choices in the face of difficult circumstances, difficult people and difficult relationships

…You can change your life and the same thing applies in a more specific context to your marriage. If you choose to (as a Christian) be more like Jesus in your relationship… If you choose to cultivate love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control in your relationship…Christians call those the fruit of the Spirit. Even if you’re not a Christian, I doubt that you will object to having those things in your life. If you choose to cultivate those things in your marriage, there will be a lot of benefits.

Christians call those the fruit of the Spirit. Even if you’re not a Christian, I doubt that you will object to having those things in your life. If you choose to cultivate those things in your marriage, there will be a lot of benefits.You’ll be more trustworthy. You will be more worthy of commitment. You will be able to more safely, more discerningly extend trust and commitment. If you’re not married yet but you’re dating, as you grow, as you become stronger and more mature. You will be able to do a better job deciding whether this person is somebody that you can spend the rest of your life with.

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You’ll be more trustworthy. You will be more worthy of commitment. You will be able to more safely, more discerningly extend trust and commitment. If you’re not married yet but you’re dating, as you grow, as you become stronger and more mature. You will be able to do a better job deciding whether this person is somebody that you can spend the rest of your life with.Wherever your relationship is, your expressions of closeness to that person will be more receivable. You’ll also be more open to things that they do to try to express closeness. One of the bestselling books on marriage and

Wherever your relationship is, your expressions of closeness to that person will be more receivable. You’ll also be more open to things that they do to try to express closeness. One of the bestselling books on marriage and relationships is The Five Love Languages. It’s often challenging for couples who, where one person has one love language, let’s say it’s touch but the other person has another love language, let’s say it’s spending time together and they’re trying to express their affection for each other in their own native love language and things get lost in translation. As you grow the fruit of the Spirit your own life, you will be more open to expressions of love that aren’t your normal expressions of love.

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As you grow the fruit of the Spirit your own life, you will be more open to expressions of love that aren’t your normal expressions of love.When you have difficulties, when you have challenges, you will be able to do more of turning towards the other person. To share your emotions with them. To share your thoughts with them. You will figure things out rather than turning away from them, stonewalling them, or turning against them and being critical or contemptuous of them.

When you have difficulties, when you have challenges, you will be able to do more of turning towards the other person. To share your emotions with them. To share your thoughts with them. You will figure things out rather than turning away from them, stonewalling them, or turning against them and being critical or contemptuous of them.You’ll be able to communicate better because you’re doing those things. You’ll be a better listener. You’ll be able to express yourself more clearly.

You’ll be able to communicate better because you’re doing those things. You’ll be a better listener. You’ll be able to express yourself more clearly. There are both sides of communication. If you can express yourself more clearly and listen more effectively, you’ll be a better communicator.

When there’s conflict, when there are challenging things in the relationship, you will have more self-control because of having the fruit of the Spirit in your life. You’ll have more self-control so that you don’t blow up and so that you can help yourself to cool down and be calm, cool and collected in the face of that conflict. You’ll be able to more genuinely, more honestly hear the opinions and the values of others. You will be able to make a greater and more impactful contribution to the life goals of your spouse and perhaps of your children.

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You’ll be able to more genuinely, more honestly hear the opinions and the values of others. You will be able to make a greater and more impactful contribution to the life goals of your spouse and perhaps of your children.

In sum, bringing all those things together you will get to take part more deeply in a meaningful life together. So, what if you are the main thing that is holding back your marriage from its greatest potential? Take courage, because if that is the case then you can change your marriage and you can maximize the potential of your marriage by choosing to cultivate love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness and self-control in yourself first and then you get all those other things in your marriage.

If you find these articles helpful, please leave a comment or a question below. Please share this on social media and consider subscribing to the email newsletter. Thank you. Have a good day.

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About the Author

I am a Christian, husband, father, counselor, and blogger. I exist to educate, equip, and empower people for great relationships.

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(1) comment

Lance February 20, 2017

Amen brother!

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