Rejoice in the wife of your youth

Let your fountain be blessed,
    and rejoice in the wife of your youth,
    a lovely deer, a graceful doe.
Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight;
    be intoxicated always in her love.

Proverbs 5:18-19


Whoever said the Bible is prudish clearly never read it. Seems clear to me that God wants married couples to enjoy each other quite a bit. Sex included. But that’s only part of the fun.

Be blessed. Rejoice. Fill with delight. Be intoxicated. Sounds like fun to me.

In context, this verse is an aside from Solomon’s warning against the sins of adultery and lust. He is making the argument that “it’s not really greener on the other side.”

Yesterday was Valentine’s Day. I think Valentine’s day is more commercialized than Christmas. That bothers me. Yet, I don’t know that I would intentionally take a day to rejoice in the wife of my youth with out it.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

The wife of my youth. @DanielTStephens

Let your fountain be blessed

This is a fertility blessing. The Bible sees children as both a personal blessing and an economic blessing. When children are young, they are little bundles of joy. When parents get old, children care for them.

Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord,
    the fruit of the womb a reward.

Psalm 127:3

Children are one of God’s tools for our sanctification. We work hard to teach them, without pushing too hard. As much as we do to teach them, they teach us. Sharing this journey with the wife of your youth is exciting, challenging, and rewarding.

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By the way. Skylar and I have another one on the way! Sawyer Callen Stephens is due June 29th.

Sawyer Callen Stephens

Rejoice in the wife of your youth

A few weeks ago Skylar and I celebrated eight years of marriage. We took a nice little getaway to a great bed and breakfast in Gig Harbor. It was a nice, quite, relaxing time to slow down and enjoy each other.

As Ray Ortlund points out, it does not say “rejoice in your young wife.” The point is not that she is young. Your wife may not be young anymore. The point is to rejoice. Have fun. Praise God for her. She trusts you. That girl has given herself to you.

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She’s probably out of your league. But she’s with you anyway.

A lovely deer, a graceful doe

For us, it’s a bit odd to compare your wife to a deer or a doe. It was a compliment in Israel. The point is not the animals. The point is that while you’re rejoicing in her, think of your wife as lovely and graceful.

Lovely and graceful are character traits, not just physical traits. God is really good at making beautiful women. Women are just as fallen as men, and those character traits are as rare in women as they are in men.

If you have a lovely and graceful wife, be thankful for her. Tell her you’ve noticed those traits in her. Tell her you appreciate her.

Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight

Go to your wife for your sexual satisfaction. Not to porn sites. Not to strip clubs. Remember again the context of this passage.

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If Solomon had italics or bold font in his days, I imagine he would have emphasized “her.”

Be intoxicated always in her love

When the Bible talks about being intoxicated or drunk, it means the same as we do. Being heavily influenced by something. But we in the 21st century seem to think being intoxicated is limited to substances.

And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit…
Ephesians 5:18

In that passage, Paul is arguing that drunk people do stupid things, but spiritual people don’t. If you’re always intoxicated in the love of the wife of your youth, you will honor her.


  1. Guys – what are some ways you can put this into action?
  2. Gals – what are some ways you notice your husbands doing this?
Categorized as Marriage

By Dan

Founder, Executive Director, Mental Health Counselor at Restored Life Counseling